7 Foolproof Ways Diabetes Can Takeover Your Thanksgiving

This is not an advice column. It is the opposite. If you, like the DiabetesDailyGrind, want to make the most of your Thanksgiving with friends and family, avoid the following seven diabetes-related behaviors:

1)  Be the high school hero during the annual family football game.

After scoring every touchdown, making every tackle, and breaking your niece’s collarbone, your family will most likely say “See you next year” and you’ll be low.

2) Join spirited conversations over the Middle East or Donald Trump.

3) Flip a family member the bird, storm out of the house, and peel out of the driveway, after losing a third game of Uno in a row.  Two hours later, your blood sugar has spiked because of the stressful exit.

4) Skip all forms of protein and go straight for the stuffing, sweet potato pie, whatever’s in Aunt Freda’s casserole, macaroni and cheese, and fudge. Enjoy sleeping off the high blood sugar on the couch.

5) Ask the person who cooked the turkey if it’s organic, non-GMO, free-range and without antibiotics.

There’s no real diabetes connection here but we figured it was tacky and still worth mentioning.

6) Forego the previous 24 hours worth of meals in preparation for the Thanksgiving carb overload.

You’ll probably be low going in and undoubtedly high afterward.

7) Begin consuming alcohol at breakfast to handle the odd conversations from your cousins who “don’t get” what you are about.

By 1pm you are shit-canned and your whole family questions whether or not you should go to rehab.