The “Oh Shit” Moment

I’m feeling good. My energy is solid. I’ve been focused all afternoon. All around, it’s been a real nice day. My perspective is nothing but positivity.

As I glance around my kitchen, I catch a glimpse of my tester. Previous to that moment, blood sugar hadn’t been in my thoughts. When I feel good, blood sugar takes a back seat to the moment. Now, I think, Why not? I feel pretty good. Let’s just give it a quick test before I eat dinner. I prick, I squeeze, my meter sucks up the blood, and there the unbelievable displays: 275 mg/dL.

Oh shit. I immediately load another test strip. This can’t be right, my mind condemns. Boom, it reads 282 the second go-round. The realization that I’m actually high hits me like a wave of flu. All of the symptoms suddenly appear. Now I’m thirsty. Now my eyes are cloudy. Now I’m tired. All of the motivation dissipates. I feel like punching something. I’m ready to sue Medtronic. How could I feel so good and then have one number change everything?

This has happened a few times in my life. Keeping your wits and being mindful here is the essence of good diabetes management. This stuff happens. Now, when I test after a few hours, I try to go in with no expectations, stating to myself, Even if you’re high, this won’t change your ability to enjoy right now.

It helps. If my blood sugar is 110, sweet! If it’s high, I’m prepared for that wave of symptoms and it isn’t quite as devastating.